Day 18, Mary's Ugliest Day Ever (Day 19), and Half of Day 20

Alright, so we didn't really get that much done on Friday practice-wise I thought. We watched a video of the show in 4th and it wasn't that good to be honest. I saw enough mistakes of my own, I knew that other people had to have some too. Our feet are still awful, and I feel like we need to take time out of practice in class or after school to work on feet to get them together, because that might be something that killed us on Saturday. Ashley got obsessed with the tacos we ate, and I hate it when my taco has a baby, BIRTHDAY, and never eat stale Junior Mints. You're welcome Ashley. We didn't get to sleep until about 10:30 listening to Moonlight Sonata on repeat. I'll admit, every once in a while, it's okay, but over and over trying to get to sleep isn't healthy.

I was plenty awake for practice despite the 4 hours of sleep I was running on. Marcus was going crazy with the fact that we didn't know the flow chart and we were tired of taking the floor on and off and I was tired of getting told what to do by freshmen. Now I know what they felt like when I was a freshman. UGH. Hated it. I couldn't sleep at all on the bus, but I did rest. Until we ate breakfast, on the bus, it got crazy trying to do everyone's hair and makeup. Mr. Palmer thought my hair was one of the better ones, but it was ugly. My face was ugly with all that paint on, and I hated Chris seeing me like that. But when I was around him, he made me feel like I wasn't wearing any paint, and that I wasn't ugly. I felt pretty even when I knew I wasn't. Nobody told me when they were going to see Odessey warm-up so instead I had to stay and watch some other lame drumlines. I'm still bitter over them not telling me they were going. I still had my makeup on when Odessey walked on the floor, and previously Kerr had joked with me saying "LOOK IT'S ODESSEY" and it was unreal how my heart stopped. Unfortunately, he was just kidding and Odessey came on after that drumline.

When I looked for him when they first came on, and I didn't see him. I started to get desperate, frantically looking for him. Then, I saw him. I saw the passion and heart he put into that show. He was so natural and beautiful out there performing and I only pulled my eyes away from him once to glance at the cymbals because of their shiny-ness and then they were back on him. Parts of my body were quaking and shaking in uncontrollable ways, and I felt like I was seeing him on a whole different level. Like when I first saw him back in 8th grade. Kinda weird, he was performing a drumline show at my middle school. Him performing is just so unbelievably beautiful to me and I don't know why...ugh, I can't get over it. You can't get any closer to him if you tried until you see him put his heart into a performance or show...even though he claims it was all for me. You can't comprehend how special and wonderful and important it made me feel. I was joyous and happy for him and me being such a vital person in his life if I truly am that much to him.

The bus ride home was lonely without him. I still had his things because we didn't make finals. Hopefully he'll see me during his spring break, but I'm never sure of when he'll show up. My makeup wouldn't come off all the way at McDonald's, so I looked like a chimney sweep until I got home. In fact, I scared Chase because he forgot I still had my makeup on. When I got home, I looked like I had been through everything, and I felt like I had. A couple world wars in fact. I took the rubber bands out of my hair and began to lay the petroleum jelly on my face. It worked quite nicely actually and my face was really soft after that. The gel and glue came out easier than I thought it would and I went straight to bed after the shower.

Mom woke me up at 7:40 today to go to early service. I considering faking sick because I knew Kerr would go to late service. But I manned up and went. Mom got mad at me because my shirt had words on it, but it just said "true beauty". Big deal. Kerr did go to late service, and we had some new people in our Sunday school class. Haven tonight in our fellowship hall, not sure if Sarah's going, but I hope not. We prayed around the outline of our new church, and we finally got all our property debts paid off.

I get to get my license on Tuesday since I'm not taking the ACT but I'm sure we'll have drumline. My dad is taking me and I really need to pass because I'm tired of people driving me around. But I might not even be able to drive right away because we only have my mom's van, my dad's car, and the Swagger Wagon, which I do NOT want to drive the Swagger Wagon. Because that's exactly what it does. Swagger. And it smells bad. And it's 17 years old. And some of the seatbelts are not functional. Maybe Dad will get a new car and give me his old one. At least that's what I've heard. I drive his car the most anyways, and I'll be driving it for my test. I hope I can remember to go under the speed limit though. :)

I love you (definitely more than you),
MC